Why Relationships Do/Don’t
Change
What is it that lies at the foundation of relationships? Why is it that relationships change over time? And can you ever be secure in a relationship? Let us explore these important questions together right now.
There are at least two things that lie at the foundation of relationships. One is your understanding of who you are. The other is your understanding of who the other person is. And what is it that can change your relationship with someone? It is new information.
If you receive new information about the person, that can change how you relate to them. For example, let’s imagine that you are married with children, and you have a church friend that comes over to your place quite often. You enjoy his company, and the children seem to enjoy him as well. But, today, you find out that he is a sex offender with a long history of pedophilia and prison sentences because of repeated offences. Would that change your relationship with that church friend? Most likely it would. Why? Because you have received new information about him, and that changes how you relate to him.
It isn’t always in a bad direction, however. You may have met one of your neighbors at a social gathering and talked with them a bit, but they seemed to be a little awkward and disheveled. You wave hello to them when you pass their house, but you aren’t quite sure what to think of them. But later you learn that they are an expert in their field of study and a candidate for the Nobel Peace Prize. Would that information change how you relate to that neighbor? Most likely it would.
If you receive new information about someone else, that can affect your relationship with that person. But how many relationships can be affected if you find out new information about yourself? It can affect every relationship you have.
If you had been confident in your relationships previously, but one day you slide into a depression that you can’t get out of, and you remain in the pit of depression for months or several years, does that affect the relationships you have? Yes, it does. You no longer have the same confidence that you had before because you have now faced an “enemy” that “conquered” you, and you see yourself in a different light. Because of that new understanding of yourself, you relate to others differently.
As humans with limited knowledge, we are always subject to changes in our relationships with others. This is because we can always be confronted with new information that changes what we think about ourselves and others, thus changing how we relate to them.
But there is a relationship you can have that will never change. That is God’s relationship with you. How much of your life is God aware of? All of it, of course. Does that also mean that God is aware of the life that you haven’t even lived yet? Psalm 139:16 says, “Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, the days fashioned for me, when as yet there were none of them.” This clearly shows that God knows the future. God knows everything that you will ever think, do, or say, and everything that you have already thought, said, and done. God knows everything from beginning to end. That means that there can be no new information with God.
Does God love you? “For God so loved [your name here] that He gave His only begotten Son, that if you believe in Him, you should not perish but have everlasting life.” John 3:16. “I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore with lovingkindness I have drawn you.” Jeremiah 31:3. When did God love you? Only after you lived a good life and proved that you were worthy of His love? No, of course not! “While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8.
What does God think of you? ““For My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways,” says the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:8,9. “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11. “How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God!” Psalm 139:17. Does God only think this of you after you have lived a good life and proven that you are worthy of God’s good thoughts? No, of course not!
When did God begin loving you and thinking good of you? It was before you were even conceived. And how much of your life was God aware of before you were conceived? All of it! Then can you ever think, say, or do anything that will change God’s love and good thoughts toward you? No, absolutely not! There is nothing that will ever surprise God. There is no new information that can come to Him that He didn’t already know. There is nothing that can change His mind about you, for His love and thoughts are for you, knowing everything your life has ever been and will ever be. You can never sin a sin so bad, or repeat a sin so often, or combine so many sins together that you could ever change God’s love for you and His good thoughts toward you. That would be impossible!
And does God know who He is? Of course! Will God’s understanding of Himself ever change? No! So, will anything ever change God’s relationship with you? No!
But can your understanding of who you are and who God is change? Yes! Therefore, your relationship with God can change, while His relationship with you never will. It is never that God goes back and forth with you. It is always that you go back and forth with God. The instability of your relationship with God is never His instability. It is your own. The more consistently you trust in Him, the more you understand who He is and what He is like, the more constant will be your relationship with Him. You can get off the rollercoaster or the yo-yo, because He is infinite, and His thoughts and love for you never change.
When you accept who God is, what He thinks of you, how He loves you, and the fact that His relationship with you will never change, that will change who you understand yourself to be. For you will see yourself in relationship to Him. You will see yourself as His child, and you will know that relationship can never be threatened or changed.
And when you know who you are in relationship to God and that your relationship can never change by anything you think, say, or do, then you know who others are in relationship to God. You know that their relationship to God can never change by anything they think, say, or do. You know that they are His child, and you know that relationship can never be threatened or changed. When you understand and believe this, then you don’t change how you think about and love others, regardless of what new information comes to you about them, because you think about them and love them like God does. And, because His love and thoughts don’t change, when you accept that love and those thoughts from God for yourself, you can then pass them on to others and love them and think good about them without changing either.
To seek for stable relationships in any other way is simply impossible, for this is the only foundation of stable relationships. And this is what God created us for in the beginning and what He is seeking to restore us to, now.
A Call to Action/Prayer
Would YOU be a part of our prayer team? We have the blessed privilege of counseling with precious children of God who are in desperate circumstances and situations, whether it be life-threatening diseases, or direct combat with the enemy. Some are so broken it is hard for them to believe that there is hope that they can be free. We know that freedom is possible through Christ. And we know that there are things God can do in answer to prayer that He otherwise could not do (the why’s and how’s of this can be a topic for another newsletter in the future). But we are limited. While we can present the truth to people, we cannot bring conviction to the heart. That is the work of the Holy Spirit.
We are asking you to join us and be a part of our prayer team to pray for those whom we are counseling with, the audiences we speak to, the ones who will be utilizing materials that we will be producing in the future, and the ones who are conducting the ministry as well. If you would be willing to be a part of our prayer team, please email us ([email protected]) your name, email address, and phone number where you can receive text messages. We will share specific prayer requests with you via email or text message. Thank you for being a huge part of this ministry in this way!
Ministry Updates
We are so grateful to Beulah Valley Farm for their sacrificial donation to New Paradigm Ministries. This family ministry / market garden just opened in Stover, Missouri, and they donated all the earnings from their opening day to New Paradigm Ministries. We are so grateful for your generosity toward us! God is so good!
This is what Beulah Valley Farm posted about their donation: Seeing so many of you drop by to say hi and support us today filled out hearts clear to the brim-Thank you! We are passionate not only about physical health through nutrient dense food, but also mental/spiritual health so we are donating 100% of today’s sales to New Paradigm Ministries as a sort of “first fruits” offering. With the mental health hit our country has taken from COVID we feel this is a worthy cause. Check them out at https://www.facebook.com/BeulahValleyFarm/
Seminars – Ava, MO and Ooltewah, TN
We had the blessed privilege of sharing with the Ava, MO and Ooltewah, TN communities since our last newsletter went out. We conducted an 8-part series at the Douglas County Veterans Memorial Association building in Ava, Missouri. The meetings were sponsored by the Ava Seventh-day Adventist Church and ran from April 21 through 30. We had good interactions with the community members and thoroughly enjoyed our time in the Ava community. We also conducted a 6-part series at the McDonald Road Seventh-day Adventist Church in Ooltewah, Tennessee. The meetings were held from May 6 through 13. Thank you for the invitation. We were grateful to spend the time with such wonderful people. And at each location, our family was able to share salve, soaps, lotions, books, Jesus Little Jewel dolls, and other natural products that we make. If you are interested in those products, you can check them out at www.betterlivingcreations.com.
YouTube
We have a new video series on our YouTube channel—Emotional Intelligence (Law of Life) Ava, 2022. It was recorded in Ava, Missouri a few weeks ago and is presented with a secular audience in mind. It includes eight presentations and will be a blessing for anyone. You can access those videos HERE.
If you haven’t done so already, please subscribe to our YouTube channel by going to YouTube, searching for New Paradigm Ministries, clicking on the New Paradigm Ministries channel, and then clicking on the Subscribe button. Or click HERE and then click on the Subscribe button. When you do this, you will automatically be informed when new videos are uploaded to our channel.
Website
Check out our new website HERE! There are still some bugs we are working on, and some edits that still need to be made, but the website is finally up and going! Once we have the bugs worked on and the edits completed, then we will start populating the website with articles, videos, past newsletters, and everything you need to be free. We are excited to be up and going! When the current issues are fixed, you will be able to access our website at www.npmin.org, www.npmin.com, www.newparadigmministries.com, and www.newparadigmministries.org.
Counseling or Health Consultations
We have had the precious privilege of working with many hurting individuals around the world. People contact us from Europe, the Caribbean islands, Central and South America, and across the United States for help. It is our joy to be able to explain the gospel to hurting people in such a way that they can become free from their struggles if/when they believe. And there have been many personal testimonies given of how the ministry has benefitted others. If you are struggling with personal, relationship, or health challenges, we are available to counsel with you. Appointments can be scheduled here: https://www.calendly.com/npmin/ Donations are appreciated.
Scheduling Seminars
If you would like to schedule Dr. Sandoval to speak for your church or community, you can contact us at [email protected]. Schedule soon, because he is already booked through August, with only a few more spots available in 2022.
Volunteer Opportunities
If you have skills in yard work, landscaping, maintenance, construction (especially if you have the equipment to do it), graphics design, videography, video editing, marketing, bookkeeping, giving money J, and more, and you would like to volunteer by putting those skills to use with New Paradigm Ministries, we would be happy to accommodate you. If you have a camper or RV, bring it with you. If you need a place to stay, we will work on it for you. We will feed you and work with you and do what we can to make your time with us a blessing. If interested, please email us at [email protected]
Upcoming Events
May 26-29, 2022
Anthony Sandoval will be leading out in the Southwestern Youth Retreat in Claremore, Oklahoma. To register or for more information, visit www.swyr.org and check out their promo video HERE.
June 13-17, 2022
Dr. Sandoval will be speaking for the Wisconsin Camp Meeting in Oxford, Wisconsin.
Dr. Sandoval will be speaking for the Wisconsin Camp Meeting in Oxford, Wisconsin.
June 29-July 3, 2022
Dr. Sandoval will be speaking for the Red River Outpost Camp Meeting in Stanton, Kentucky.
Dr. Sandoval will be speaking for the Red River Outpost Camp Meeting in Stanton, Kentucky.
July 27-31, 2022
Dr. Sandoval will be speaking for the Hartland Convocation in Rapidan, Virginia.
Dr. Sandoval will be speaking for the Hartland Convocation in Rapidan, Virginia.
August 1-6, 2022
Dr. Sandoval will be speaking in Pracht, Germany for a camp meeting there.
Dr. Sandoval will be speaking in Pracht, Germany for a camp meeting there.
August 21-28, 2022
Dr. Sandoval will be teaching a Biblical Counseling class for Total Health Spokane.
Dr. Sandoval will be teaching a Biblical Counseling class for Total Health Spokane.
September 26 – October 1, 2022
Dr. Sandoval will be speaking at the SDA Church in Sandpoint, Idaho.
Dr. Sandoval will be speaking at the SDA Church in Sandpoint, Idaho.
Donate
If the Lord is laying it upon your heart to support the work of New Paradigm Ministries financially, we would be most appreciative. Your tax-deductible donations can be given via check to:
New Paradigm Ministries
14527 Berry Rd.
Cabool, MO 65689
14527 Berry Rd.
Cabool, MO 65689
Or you can donate on our website at the following link: https://www.npmin.org/donate.html
In Christ,
Mark Sandoval, MD